Perhaps Darwin’s Theory of Evolution and the survival of the fittest is true. We tend to operate by default, with a flight or fight mode. Fear, worry, and negative thinking seem to dominate our thoughts and behaviour.
For every challenge life throws our way, the mind goes into overdrive and we come up with the longest list of negatives and would be not although none of these may come true.
Whether it’s a feedback, a memory, a comment, a feeling or an emotion, we tend to focus more on negatives rather than positives. It’s just not easy to control your thoughts to focus on the positive.
Feeling motivated, positive, driven, happy or being strong takes so much effort and energy yet feeling bad, sad, upset, frustrated, disappointed or angry seems to come to us so easily.
How many of us see the glass half full when by genetic we seem to only see the glass half empty? You don’t need to stand on your head to turn the glass around and see it half full. It is all in the eyes of the beholder. It is all within the power of your mind and it’s time you should start “optimising yourself” to see the positive things in life.
If I were to ask you to list down things that went wrong today, you’d be able to do it very easily within a few minutes. Try listing down 10 blessings that came your way today in the same amount of time.
I’m sure you would have to think harder, look deeper and you may not even be able to complete writing past 5 blessings. It takes zero effort to see things that are wrong or missing in our lives but it is not easy to see the blessings in our lives.
Why is it not easy to control your thoughts to focus on the positive?
Are we naturally built this way or have we been trained to be negative from a very young age?
One of the surest ways to be happy each day is to think positive. Do things, say things, think things that err to the positive. It does take effort to have a positive mindset. It does take conscious energy to turn your thoughts, sights, and views from bad to good but it’s something worth doing.
At first, it may take longer or you struggle to understand how to be positive but as time goes by, it becomes second nature. Instead of looking at everything in a negative light you will by default, see everything from a positive perspective. You can control your thoughts to focus on the positive.
1. Being in The Moment
Being in the moment simply means keeping your thoughts, feelings, and consciousness focused on where you are. Our physical body and our mind are always so distant from each other. We’d be sitting on our favourite sofa at home and yet our mind would be an ocean or a lifetime away at a distant place with someone else.
It’s time you need to stop rushing and start living. Simply focusing on the moment lets you enjoy being where you are. It teaches you to appreciate what’s right in front of you and not worrying or thinking about people and things that are not there. Focus on the good and capture each moment. There is beauty in it. Each moment only comes once and it is gone in a split second.
2. Feeling Grateful
Most of us are so self-absorbed that we do not take time to look at other people and how their lives are lived. Stop and watch those around you. Not family and friends, but total strangers. People you pass by in the airport, other shoppers you meet at the mall or people you come across on the streets.
You’d be surprised how worse off others can be compared to you. Someone may have lost an arm in a recent accident, another raising a down syndrome child, one just mourning the death of a loved one, while someone else just found out she has cancer and wondering what life is left for her. Look. See. Notice what is beyond yourself. When you do that, how much more blessed and grateful you will be for all that is in your own life.
3. Make Reading a Daily Habit
There is so much to read out there either in hardcopy or online. Take time to read, it can be a few pages of a good book or just an article. Fill yourself with knowledge. The more you learn, the more you will feel good about yourself. If something is on your mind, go look it up, understand it better, seek the knowledge you need to let you live a better life.
All this information is available today without costing you a single dime. It is just waiting for you to discover it. Become a lifelong learner. Start by reading each day.
4. Do Something You Love Everyday
What little things in life put a smile on you? Having a cup of your favourite coffee, a morning walk, watching the stars at night, talking to a good friend, perhaps a long shower, listening to music, meditating, running or maybe even cooking? Find out what simple things in life you enjoy doing and put it on your daily schedule.
I love having my coffee in the quiet of the morning and always end my day with some good music. It makes my days better and no matter what happens throughout the day, I know I had started and ended my day right.
5. Spend Your Days with Positive People
Are you spending most of your hours with people who energize you or people who suck the life out of you? Whether it’s being in a job that you hate or being around family and friends who drain the energy out of you, who you spend most of your time with truly determines how you perceive yourself and your life.
Whether it’s at work or life in general, spend more time with people who are positive. Each time you go to them with a negative, their speech, their reaction, their response and their presence itself will turn your negatives to a positive.
You can change the way you see the world and this can be done when you can control your thought. Being optimistic and positive is definitely a skill to be learned, practiced and lived. It is by far one of the best lessons that you can learn in life.